“It’s time to say goodbye, but…I’d much rather say hello. Hello to a new adventure.” Ernie Harwell
“Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.” Seneca
For years, I told the women in my Domestic Violence Support group and other people I worked with that, if despite all your efforts trying to make something work, (especially with little done by the other person), and it’s still not working, it is time to move on. Who knew that rule applied to more than relationships?
Though we are first time homebuyers, I still knew housing offers didn’t always work. I had all the general concepts and a great real estate agent (any Raleigh folks looking to move, let me just say Kris Cuddy). And on our first outing, she showed me a house and I thought it was love at first sight. We talked and made an offer. (It looked something like the one to the right.)
Oh, we had an issue or two. And just like in any relationship, I expected it would take some work. Kris tried really hard to play the “mediator” as I have in many marital counseling situations. But despite her efforts, it kept being impossible, no meeting half-way on their part to build a connection. Relationships take work, but it shouldn’t be like pounding your head into a wall trying to make it fall.
Keeping a firm grip on making things a win win for everyone, Kris kept trying while still protecting Doug and my interests as her first priority. Yesterday, however, after four days of constant resistance on the seller’s agent’s part, it was time close the door on the offer.
Last night, the reminder of every time I repeated, “Time to move on” came back to me. It’s a really good lesson in many life circumstances. Yet, I can’t be a clinical social worker and not say in relationship circumstances using a professional for assistance before you reach the “move on” place can be wise. In real estate, it is absolutely critical. But we did, and she was one of the best! Hearing how hard Kris worked, Doug and I felt she had tried everything. And we saw it wasn’t going to happen.
So, this will be an atypically brief post for me and not very refined, because I have to get back to house-hunting. Kris and I will be looking at houses in Raleigh again tomorrow and boy, do I have stuff to do.
I hope this time we can make the new marriage of house and homeowner work, and Kris gets to do the marriage ceremony/closing! So, for my finger crossing friends…keep some good thoughts for us. And for my praying people…more prayers are welcome. Onward to new adventures in hunting the home of our future!
Buying a house and moving home is right up there among the top causes of stress. Sadly, your experience is quite common, but I hope it improves this time around. And you have Kris on your side, so it will be alright in the end! Btw, thanks for the Seneca quote – I thought that was by Semisonic!
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😂
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Oh how frustrating for you, I hope you have better luck next time and Clive, hilarious!
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Jo, I hope that by the time you read this reply that the house hunt has yielded a more satisfactory result. Sending positive thoughts to you. If you get a moment please reading last Friday’s Feminist Friday post. I mentioned your name.
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I have been tied up house hunting. Thank you you so much for mentioning me and your kind words.
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